Last night, I asked what the letters “U B S” stood for ^[1] — using “U Better Sing” and “Unreliable Bankers Swiss” as examples.

Readers responded with dozens ^[1] of examples of possible other names that worked well. In fact, there were quite a few fantastic suggestions, which I culled down to a Letterman style short list of my favorites:

Top 10 Things the Letters “UBS” Stands For

10. Uncle Broke Sam
9. Unlocked Banking Secrets
8. Untaxed Bastards Suffer!
7. Uber Blown Secrecy
6. Untrustworthy Bankster Swine
5. Used to BS (the IRS)
4. Unconcealed Banknote Storage
3. Unlawful Benefits Seized
2. U’d Better Surrender

and the number one thing UBS stands for:

1. Utilize Bahamas, Swiftly!

Honorable Mentions after the jump . . .

U’r Bank Sux (mine is better)
U Been Swissed
Unverschämte Bankiererschwindler” (= Shameless Swindling Bankers
Utterly Broken System
UncleSam’s Bitch in Switzerland
Unlucky Buffoons Snafued
U’ve Been Screwed
Universal Bean Spillers
Unfaithful Bank of Snitcherland
Unmitigated Blabbing of Secrets
Undisclosed Billions Still
Ultimate Bitch Slap
Universally Bullshiting Sycophants
Uncoordinated Bankers Society
Ugly Banking Solutions
United Bullying States
U Bilked Sam
Up your Butt with a Strapon
Unscrupulous Bourgeois Sentenced
U B Sentenced

And a special “creative honorable mention” for spell it backwards in SMS text messaging…
S2BU = Sucks 2 Be You