Time to crowdsource some comedy from your creative minds, all at the expense of the Swissies:
We know that UBS, Switzerland’s largest bank, has rolled over and is divulging the dirt on 4,450 accounts to settle a lawsuit with the United States.  This is forcing the Swiss government to divest itself of its UBS position.  Those 4,450 names of American clients will go straight to the IRS for prosecution and disgorgement of back taxes — plus interest and penalties.

Question: What does the acronym U B S stand for?

U Better Sing

Unreliable Bankers Swiss

Unexpected Benefits of Secrets?

Anything else? Use comments for suggestions . . .

Category: Humor, Legal, Taxes and Policy

Please use the comments to demonstrate your own ignorance, unfamiliarity with empirical data and lack of respect for scientific knowledge. Be sure to create straw men and argue against things I have neither said nor implied. If you could repeat previously discredited memes or steer the conversation into irrelevant, off topic discussions, it would be appreciated. Lastly, kindly forgo all civility in your discourse . . . you are, after all, anonymous.

89 Responses to “UBS Stands For . . . ?”

  1. Last time we did this with GM, it worked out very well

    G.M. Stands For . . .

    Top 10 Things the Letters “GM” Stands For

  2. Cohen says:

    Unfortunate Bank Selection

  3. Mannwich says:

    Unctuous Bailout Scum

  4. David Merkel says:

    U Been Suckered.

    Unmitigated Blabbing of Secrets

    Uncoordinated Bankers Society

  5. brentg1117 says:

    Unknown Banking Soured

  6. sharkattak says:

    U Been Swissed

  7. blueoysterjoe says:

    Useful Banking Secrets

  8. VennData says:

    Untaxed Blowout Sale

    Unusual Bi-Lateral Scrutiny

    Unless Birkenfeld Squeals

  9. VennData says:

    Ur Banging Stone

  10. Pat G. says:

    U Ben Screwed

  11. gloppie says:

    Ultra Bitching Shyte
    Unnerving Bailout Situation
    Universally Bullshiting Sycophants

  12. VennData says:

    U’d Better Surrender

  13. Moss says:

    Uber Blown Secrecy

  14. teraflop says:

    Uber Brass Sacks
    Usama Banq Suisse
    Unique Business Strategy
    Upended Bank in Stanford
    U’ve Breached Security
    U’ve Been Served
    Unstable Borrowed Systems
    Uncle Ben Shocked
    Underwater Bottom-Sellers

  15. cvienne says:

    Useless Blowhards Shitthebed

  16. Clay says:

    Unlocked Banking Secrets

    The Draconian arm of the Federal Gov’t can be long when it chooses to extend it.

  17. gloppie says:

    Ubiquitous Bernanke Suppository

  18. cvienne says:

    Utterly Broken System

  19. pmorrisonfl says:

    Usain Bolt Subpoenaed
    U Better Sell
    Unearthed Bankers Swiss

  20. tawm says:

    Unjustifiably Broad Sweep

    Having a foreign bank account alone is not a crime — many expats do — just hiding income is.

  21. cvienne says:

    … and just think… even if you spell it backwards in SMS text messaging…

    s2bu = Sucks to be you

  22. tawm says:

    United Bullying States — think the Swiss will look kindly on our government the next time we need their help to mediate with a terrorist regime?

  23. gregorsamsa says:

    U B Stupid

  24. ElvisP says:

    Unfortunately Ben’s Strapped

  25. call me ahab says:

    U Boned Switzerland

  26. OldSouth says:

    Uh-oh Better Settle
    U Been Screwed
    Unprecedented Bankster Sweep? (not damn likely)

    But in reality:

    Uncle Broke Sam

  27. call me ahab says:


    funny shit

  28. bobmitchell says:

    Used to BS the IRS, now not so much

  29. The Curmudgeon says:

    Ugly Banking Solutions

    KM4…damn, I think I might have dated her:)

  30. VennData says:

    Unconcealed Banknote Storage

  31. TomCole says:

    Uncle Ben’s Servant
    US’s Best Servant
    US’s Backdoor Snitcher
    U Been Screwed
    Untaxed Banking Stash
    Unnecessarily Blamed for Scammers
    Under Bullying, Snitches
    Unmasked Banking Swindlers
    Underhanded Bludgeoned Shyster
    Unexpected Black Swan
    US’s Betrayer of Secrets

  32. VennData says:

    Unitary Been Sustained

  33. km4 says:

    Actually machine on left is all of Wall St. (not just UBS ) and American taxpayer is bending over at machine on right

  34. neelyll says:

    Unreliable Bi^^^^s Squealed

  35. jujutrader says:

    Up your Butt with a Strapon

  36. Mannwich says:

    U Bought Shit

  37. Mannwich says:

    Unfrozen Banking Sleestaks

  38. uno says:

    Used to Be Secure

  39. VennData says:

    Unscrupulous Bourgeois Sentenced

  40. VennData says:

    Upperclass Brig Sequestration

  41. Cursive says:

    Undisclosed Billions Still

    UBS only agreed to disclose 5000 of 52,000 accounts. Who are the other 47,000? At this stage of the decline of our republic, I think you are definitely more of a kook if you spend more time postulating why there is no conspiracy.

    BR, your take on the 47,000 and why they will remain undisclosed?

  42. hal9000 says:

    U B Sentenced

  43. Mannwich says:

    U Bilked Sam

  44. Pat G. says:

    U Ben Soldout

  45. wunsacon says:

    [In the voice of Get Smart's "Siegfried" character]:

    Union Banken fur Ssshtealin’

  46. greg says:

    Unctuously Bereft Sociopaths

  47. lilvin says:

    Universal Bean Spillers

  48. Drewbie says:

    Undress Bendover Scream

  49. Daffyorbugs says:

    Utilize Bahamas, Sorry!

  50. Bob the unemployed says:

    U’ve Been Screwed

  51. Transor Z says:

    Uncertain Banking Standards

    Untrustworthy Bankster Swine

  52. Transor Z says:

    Unfaithful Bank of Snitcherland

  53. going broke says:

    Undisclosed Billions Stached
    Undisclosed Bank Scratch
    U’r Bank Sux (mine is better)

  54. going broke says:

    U’ve Been Subpoenaed

  55. DL says:

    This is all good news for banks in other countries like Panama, Cayman Islands, Isle of Man, Channel Islands, Belize, etc.

    Obama’s tax collectors got the “low hanging fruit”, but that’s all.

  56. alfred e says:

    U Been Shanghai’d
    Agree the better question is about the other 47,000?
    Top of the scale? Think not.

    Phil Gramm on the list? Doubt it. He’s there.

    Losers the UBS can afford to sacrifice. Bottom of the scale. Very bottom.

  57. alfred e says:

    Well that’s the other one:

    U Been Sacrificed. Enjoy it.

  58. SINGER says:

    Ultimately Beyond Shady

  59. Winston Munn says:

    Unlicensed Bankshare Scalpers

  60. going broke says:

    U’r Busted… Seriously!

  61. contrabandista13 says:

    And the winner is………

    1. gloppie……. Universally Bullshiting Sycophants

    2. gloppie…… Ubiquitous Bernanke Suppository

    3. gloppie…… Ultra Bitching Shyte

    It’s a sweep… Congratulations…. That was funny…. You better get some therapy bro…….



  62. cvienne says:

    Unethical Banking Scoundrels

  63. cvienne says:

    Ultimate Bitch Slap

  64. cvienne says:

    Unleash Ben Stein

  65. cvienne says:

    Uniforms Becoming Striped

  66. cvienne says:

    Unless Barack Subpoenad

  67. aitrader says:

    U’re Balance Shanghaied
    Unlawful Benefits Seized
    UncleSam’s Bitch in Switzerland
    Unlucky Buffoons Snafued
    U.S. Balance-due Supplemented
    U.S. Bankruptcy Staved-off

  68. aitrader says:


    U’re Balance Seized

  69. zodiac says:

    Untaxed Bastards Suffer!

  70. postmodernprimate says:

    U Bubba’s Slave

    (Thank you for banking with UBS!)

  71. brazzer says:

    I registered just to leave this obvious one.

    Unbelievably Bad Service.

    Lifetime lurker, hats off to your site and your commenter’s.

  72. buermann says:

    Ahh, my old bosses. I just fixed their y2k bugs, not their investment strategies.

    Usurious Bailout Swindle.

  73. amazed says:

    U Been Spotted

  74. tawm says:

    Unilaterally Bludgeoned Secrecy

  75. Bruce in Tn says:

    Unified Banking Snitches

  76. Bruce in Tn says:

    Undone Banking Scoundrels

  77. ajani says:

    u b stupid

  78. cvienne says:

    U Basically Suck

  79. crazyjerrygarcialover says:

    Borrowers and

  80. gordo365 says:

    Uh-oh Better Skedaddle

  81. Wes Schott says:

    Uncle Stupids Bitch

  82. mtl says:

    i do believe the blame is being misplaced ……

  83. crazyjerrygarcialover says:


    Sad to say but I am forced to agree with you, “Undisclosed Billions Still

    UBS only agreed to disclose 5000 of 52,000 accounts. Who are the other 47,000? At this stage of the decline of our republic, I think you are definitely more of a kook if you spend more time postulating why there is no conspiracy.

    BR, your take on the 47,000 and why they will remain undisclosed?”

    How about:


  84. beaufou says:

    Snap, I missed the fun part.

    United Banksters of Switzerland

  85. beaufou says:


    Are the 52 000 from the US?
    Surely, there must be a few accounts from Germany, created around 1939-1944.

  86. [...] night, I asked what the letters “U B S” stood for — using “U Better Sing” and “Unreliable Bankers Swiss” as [...]

  87. I-Man says: