Available Labor Rate Increases To 10.2%
Another brilliant piece of parody, via The Onion:
“In what is being touted by the Labor Department as extremely positive news, the nation’s available labor rate has reached double digits for the first time in 26 years, bringing the total number of potentially employable Americans to an impressive 15.7 million . . . According to the Department of Labor’s report, nearly 200,000 more Americans suddenly became fully hirable in October alone. And November saw unprecedented gains in the number of high-quality auto workers, teachers, lawyers, part-time retailers, and even doctors who could be employed.”
Gotta love the chart:
click for larger graphic
Bloody brilliant!
>
Hat tip Laurence
Source:
Labor Dept: Available Labor Rate Increases To 10.2%
Onion DECEMBER 5, 2009 | ISSUE 45•49
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/labor_dept_available_labor_rate
December 8th, 2009 at 8:17 pm
On another note, JUUUSST a bit “weaker than expected” in Japan, the original zombie country. How could their “estimates” be this far off, pray tell?
Dec. 9 (Bloomberg) — Japan’s economy expanded less than initially estimated in the third quarter as companies cut spending in the wake of the country’s deepest postwar recession.
http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601087&sid=ax3_QSdAjaZk&pos=1
December 8th, 2009 at 8:19 pm
Speaking of “humorous”, AIG is the gift that keeps on taking, I mean, giving.
http://www.zerohedge.com/article/aig-general-counsel-who-protested-meager-500k-have-her-bluff-called-get-sacked
December 8th, 2009 at 8:56 pm
“extremely positive news,” For who? Employers? First they sell our jobs to the lowest labor market, then they make us jump through hoops while scrutinizing our qualifications for the few that are left…
December 8th, 2009 at 9:14 pm
Great chart.
Except… if everyone is Unionized, THEY will tell you who will work for you and how much you have to pay.
Cheers
December 8th, 2009 at 9:16 pm
Uh Pat G., it’s The Onion. Parody, sarcasm. You know. That stuff.
December 8th, 2009 at 9:23 pm
@ Troy
Oh yeah. My bad.
December 8th, 2009 at 11:30 pm
Ah, Pat G. The hallmark of great satire is that it can be passable in the funhouse mirror world we find ourselves. Jonathan Swift would be proud.
December 9th, 2009 at 12:13 am
>> while scrutinizing our qualifications for the few that are left…
And if you’re not *perfect*, they’ll hire an H1 or L1 (rotated in/out every few months to “remain in compliance”) at a discount (or not!).
(Nobody gets fired for buying IBM, buying MS, or outsourcing!)
December 9th, 2009 at 12:21 am
Here’s someone who need s nice long dose of unemployment…
Tiger’s Woods up to nine.
http://www.usmagazine.com/celebritynews/news/at-least-nine-women-now-claim-they-had-flings-with-tiger-woods-1970241
I wonder what he’ll do on the back nine.
Yeah, golf, such a classy dignified sport. Shh… shh… Tiger’s putter’s up…
Lieger Woods. Get out of my face.
December 9th, 2009 at 12:30 am
One wonders why then are there so many job advertisements by the same companies, week after week after week on places like Craigslist, Monster, Dice, etc. if there is so much potential talent available?
December 9th, 2009 at 7:57 am
Jojo Says:
December 9th, 2009 at 12:30 am
One wonders why then are there so many job advertisements by the same companies, week after week after week on places like Craigslist, Monster, Dice, etc. if there is so much potential talent available?
——————————————————————————-
To help justify the H1B’s and other covert reasons. Anything not to hire Americans.
December 9th, 2009 at 12:06 pm
JoJo imo its a psychological ploy .. provide the impression there are jobs .. its not the systems fault .. its your fault .. go back to school .. pump the various lower diamond systems .. get a haircut, get better clothes, retype your resume (hire a pro), drive here there and everywhere … hang in there – there’s a way into getting hired
.. and ..
that cap’ist thing too .. survival of the fittest .. cache of waiting talent