Fear of Terror Makes People Stupid … So Here’s Some Comic Relief
I have exhaustively documented the fact that fear of terror makes people stupid and easy to manipulate, and that the government intentionally exaggerates the threat of terrorism in order to make people afraid. Indeed, Americans’ overblown fear of terrorism is arguably the root cause of our loss of prosperity and freedom.
Because humor is a great antidote to fear, I am sharing this 2003 spoof on terror scaremongering (it is admittedly rather adolescent … but amusing):
The US government has a new website, http://www.ready.gov/. It’s another attempt at scare mongering in the style of the old “duck and cover” advice after WWII.
The fun thing is that these pictures are so ambiguous they could mean anything! Here are a few interpretations.
If you have set yourself on fire, do not run.
If you spot terrorism, blow your anti-terrorism whistle. If you are Vin Diesel, yell really loud.
If you spot a terrorist arrow, pin it against the wall with your shoulder.
If you are sprayed with an unknown substance, stand and think about a cool design for a new tattoo.
Use your flashlight to lift the walls right off of you!
The proper way to eliminate smallpox is to wash with soap, water and at least one(1) armless hand.
[Adam Levine] is a terrorist. If you spot this smooth criminal with dead, dead eyes, run the hell away.
Hurricanes, animal corpses and your potential new tattoo have a lot in common. Think about it.
Be on the lookout for terrorists with pinkeye and leprosy. Also, they tend to rub their hands together manically.
If a door is closed, karate chop it open.
Try to absorb as much of the radiation as possible with your groin region. After 5 minutes and 12 seconds, however, you may become sterile.
After exposure to radiation it is important to consider that you may have mutated to gigantic dimensions: watch your head.
If you’ve become a radiation mutant with a deformed hand, remember to close the window. No one wants to see that shit.
If you hear the Backstreet Boys, Michael Bolton or Yanni on the radio, cower in the corner or run like hell.
If your lungs and stomach start talking, stand with your arms akimbo until they stop.
If you are trapped under falling debris, conserve oxygen by not farting.
If you lose a contact lens during a chemical attack, do not stop to look for it.
Category: Humor, Think Tank
Please use the comments to demonstrate your own ignorance, unfamiliarity with empirical data and lack of respect for scientific knowledge. Be sure to create straw men and argue against things I have neither said nor implied. If you could repeat previously discredited memes or steer the conversation into irrelevant, off topic discussions, it would be appreciated. Lastly, kindly forgo all civility in your discourse . . . you are, after all, anonymous.
WELL DONE!
In all fairness, Ready.gov has made a lot of improvements since then. They may not even still offer those drawings. These days, it is just a series of brocures on how to prepare for an emergency. Considering how many people seem to think that the election is a referendum on who can be the most extreme, it might be a good idea to plan for a whole series of emergencies.
I’m particularly fond of the brochure on how to defend yourself against penguin attacks.
Paying hundreds of billions for the presumption of safety from our government, only to be scammed with political correctness, grandma pat-downs, a military prepared to fight…the last war, and a plethora of rules, regulations and executive orders that erode our freedom.
The direction we are headed, I think many folks may be cajoled into regarding the above panels seriously. Submit and obey. The government is your friend and protector.
“Whether the mask is labelled Fascism, Democracy, or Dictatorship of the Proletariat, our great adversary remains the Apparatus—the bureaucracy, the police, the military. Not the one facing us across the frontier or the battlelines, which is not so much our enemy as our brother’s enemy, but the one that calls itself our protector and makes us its slaves. No matter what the circumstances, the worst betrayal will always be to subordinate ourselves to this Apparatus, and to trample underfoot, in its service, all human values in ourselves and in others.” – Simone Weil
“deal with the devil” when you take money from Washington. Wall Street would have been much better off if they had simply failed and proceeded to the bankruptcy Judge. this mere “War on Terror” is now being morphed into a war of “all against all” by the New York media. If they succeed i’m not sure if there will be much of a New York media left to report on it…as “that’s Washington Business numero uno.”