Gather round for the Trader version of our Shopmas suggestions. These aren’t the usual Bull & Bear cliches you typically see — its all good stuff for the trader in your life. (You can see out earlier suggestions:  part one, part two and part three)

This round of Shopmas ideas is for the guy who executes your trades and helps you work out of trouble — the list has something for everybody, be it gunslinger, technician or clerk on your holiday shopping list whose P&L has been very, very good.

With tongue firmly placed in cheek, here is our gift giving guide for the trader in your shop

Go forth and stimulate :

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MURDER, INK Pad & Pen Set $8

This 300-page sticky notepad is perfect for your best poison pen notes, letters of resignation, hit lists, and office to-do’s.

Murder, Ink comes complete with blood spattered pen, so it’s sure to make a statement on your desk right beside that suspiciously sharp letter opener. Each pad and pen is packed In a full-color illustrated giftbox.

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WTF Stamp  $9

Every desk gets trade confirms they don’t recognize — the standard response is “DK” (Dont Know).

• Now with smooth, satisfying “ker-chunk”
• A perfect office gift for the boss or coworker
• 3.2 x 3.5 x 1.625 inches; imprint area: 2.25 x 0.83 inches

These days, trades are coming back that are simply too silly to DK — they demand, a WTF!?!

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Trading/Wall Street Movies: After a long day in the turret, what can be more relaxing than kicking back and watching films about trading? Here are 4 recommended flicks for your keyboard jockey:

-Eddie Murphy Trading Places ($13) Only tangentially related to trading, but filled with lots of oft quoted lines, this comedy is good for everyone.
-Wall Street ($24) Blue Horseshoe loves Anacott Steel Made in 1987, back when the US had an SEC, an entity that once enforced security laws. Dated, but watchable. Skip the 2010 version — its unwatchable.
-Boiler Room ($16) Know a retail stock jockey? This gritty flick will show him what the bad old days were like in the land of penny stocks. A cautionary tale with a great cast.
-Glengary Glen Ross ($9) For the Institutional Sales Trader in your life. Give him this DVD, but no coffee — Coffee’s for closers only.
-Margin Call $14 Called one of the greatest Wall Street movie ever made.

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Paul Wilmott Introduces Quantitative Finance $57

Paul Wilmott Introduces Quantitative Finance is an accessible introduction to the classical side of quantitative finance specifically for university students and budding trader wannabes.

Adapted from the comprehensive, even epic, works Derivatives and Paul Wilmott on Quantitative Finance, it includes carefully selected chapters to give the student a thorough understanding of futures, options and numerical methods.

Software is included to help visualize the most important ideas and to show how techniques are implemented in practice. There are comprehensive end-of-chapter exercises to test students on their understanding.

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Ted Baker Ties: £50

Years ago, I was wearing a Ted Baker tie to a Fox News shooting. Just before we shot, I went to change into something much less loud, and the director stopped me, saying “TV washes everything out — the bright tie will pop. It works well — Trust me on this.”

I did, it did, and now all of my favorite ties come from Ted Baker. They are bright, colorful and fun. If you must wear a noose around your neck for work, well then this is the way to go.

NYC just opened a new Ted Baker Store on 5th Avenue.

And for you bargain hunters, you can find Ted Baker on sale at Century 21 — normally $89, on sale for $30-40.

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Olympus 142665 DM-620 SLV Voice Recorder  $107 

When it comes to recording telephone calls or other conversations surreptitiously, you wont find a better piece of gear at this price than the Olympus DM620.

- Great audio recording quality
- Excellent microphone sensitivity
- Records in WAV, MP3 or MWA
- Backlit screen
- Metal body
- Long battery life (comes with 2 AA rechargeable batteries)
- Unit can recharge batteries via USB

Requires an adapter to plug into a phone jack

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Triumph of the Optimists: 101 Years of Global Investment Returns $103.04

Investors have too often extrapolated from recent experience.

In the 1950s, who but the most rampant optimist would have dreamt that over the next fifty years the real return on equities would be 9% per year? Yet this is what happened in the U.S. stock market, as the optimists triumphed.

Sometimes an optimist is someone who never had much experience — and this book extends that experience across regions and across time, presenting a comprehensive and consistent analysis of investment returns for equities, bonds, bills, currencies and inflation, spanning sixteen countries, from the end of the nineteenth century to the beginning of the twenty-first.

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Books for the Trader’s Library Three different book shelves for the different traders in your life.

The Newbie Trader (Starter pack)
1 Stock Market Wizards: Interviews with America’s Top Stock Traders
2 Reminiscences of a Stock Operator
3 How I Trade and Invest in Stocks and Bonds

The Historian
1 Bull: A History of the Boom and Bust, 1982-2004
2 Black Monday: The Catastrophe of October 19, 1987
3 Extraordinary Popular Delusions & the Madness of Crowds

The Technician
1. Technical Analysis from A to Z
2. Encyclopedia of Chart Patterns
3. Japanese Candlestick Charting

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width=Padron Anniversary Series 1926 Exclusivo ($300/case) For the cigar smoker on your list, I suggest one of my favorite smokes. Consistently top rated by Cigar Aficionado & frequently named top 5 Cigar of the Year, a fast delightful smoke.

Spark ‘em up with the Lotus 21 Twin Flame Torch Lighter ($49) — A great piece of hardware (I own two)

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Parrot AR.Drone 2.0 Quadricopter Controlled by Smart Phones/Tablets – Orange/Blue $300

Controlled by iPod touch, iPhone, iPad, and Android Devices;

Sometimes, you cannot get out of your chair, but you need to see whats going on in other parts of your hedge fund.

The Quad receives 720p high-definition live video streaming to smartphone or tablet while flying; you can record & shares videos & pictures straight from the copter — great for compliance or sharing trails of inside information with the SEC to save your own bacon!

Send incriminating evidence straight from your live flight videos in HD and send them directly to YouTube

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Blueair 203W HepaSilent Air-Purification System $329
Blueair 450E HepaSilent Digital Air-Purification System $629

These are solid, high performance multi-filter air cleaner is very quiet,efficient and effective. The Hepafilters can clear the air in a dirty trading room in 20 minutes. Pulls all of the contaminants, pollens, dust, smoke, allergens from the air and holds them in replaceable filters.

The size of these should be a function of the size of the room they go in.

Energy Star 3-speed air purifier with HEPASilent technology
5 air changes per hour for rooms up to 580 square feet
CADR rating of 375 for smoke, dust, and pollen; SurroundAir system
Galvanized steel construction; 100-percent-recyclable filter media

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Spa Massage De-Stress Muscle Release: $150-500  This deeply restorative treatment is specifically designed for tight, stressed and aching muscles. Too many hours spent sitting on the trading desk leaves your body stiff, tight and painful. Swedish and cross muscle fiber massage techniques with stretching and draining are combined with essential oils known for their beneficial effects on the circulation.

Try the Nickel Spa for Men: They do massages, manicure/pedicures, facials, and the infamous “Boyzillian” (if you have to ask, you don’t want to know).

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Pax premium loose leaf vaporizer $250

Maybe your trader doesn’t go for the touchy feely stuff, but he still needs some downtime to stay sharp. Get him the Pax Vaporizer. The Pax heats but never burns his “tobacco,” releasing a delicious vapor. Using Pax is as easy as 1-2-3 (see video; Wired review here).

“Easy to use, very solid and high quality. Feels right when you have it in your hand. Taste is awesome without the harshness. Extremely satisfied and not disappointed at all.”

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Saddleback Leather Briefcase, Classic Dark Coffee Brown $610 

Gorgeous heavy duty briefcase comes in a variety of colors + a 100 year warranty.  Its not light, but if you ever have to make a dash for the border, this is the bag you want to throw your bearer bonds into.

-Crafted from 100% Full-grain boot Leather but thicker.
-Constructed with no breakable parts like snaps, zippers, etc.
-4 inner pockets; 2 for access
-Every stress point is double-stitched, riveted or reinforced with hidden nylon strapping. ories 2 for pens 2 outer side and 1 large back magazine pocket
-Tough and thick 4 to 5 oz. full grain leather sewn with the strongest thread we could find

 

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Embody Chair by Herman Miller – Home Office Desk Task Chair with Adjustable Arms $1639

The Aeron Chair? Thats so 1990s. This is the chair for anyone stuck in their seat for long periods of time and who needs to be alert, rested and comfortable (but not too comfortable).

You point. You click. You fixate on your computer screen. And you sit still for hours. Mesmerized. Your body screams, “Move!”–unless you’re seated in Embody. Designed specifically for people who sit at computers, Embody makes you feel like you’re floating. It promotes health-positive sitting, creating harmony between you and your computer to help you focus on your work and think more clearly. In fact, it’s the first work chair that supports your body and your mind.

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Bethpage Black Golf Course: Its not easy to get a tee time at the home of one of the toughest courses on the US Open tour, but it can be done.

Especially if you are willing to take a day off from trading and go midweek — Weekdays (18 Holes): $130.00

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CineMassive Trio Gemini 17D 6 Screen holder : $1,749

This entry-level (?!) six screen display has a crisp, clear digital signal, a full, rich digital canvas that will provide you with the full view of any picture. Designed to provide an immersive experience, allowing your trader to visualize a large amount of information at once.

Using a multi-screen display for the first time is often described as feeling like having received a new lobe of brain.

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Caddy for a Cure:  ($5,000 and up) For the avid golfer who is having an especially good year.

Caddy for the Cure gives an opportunity to spend the day caddying for one of the world’s best golfers at an official PGA TOUR tournament. Select a player from the PGA TOUR events list; You either “Buy It Now” at the price listed, or make your best offer.

The guys I know who did this lost their minds, saying it was the greatest experience on a golf course they ever had.

And, 100% of the proceeds goes to charity.

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•  Breguet Grande Complication Tourbillon Messidor $154,200

For the star trader on your team, this little gift will let him know that he — and his P&L — are appreciated by senior management.

Sure, the rest of the office may resent the indulgence of this gift, but they are easily replaced off of Craig’s list.

 

 

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That’s our tongue in cheek guide to Gift for Traders for 2012.

If you have any other gift suggestions, by all means use the comments

Category: Consumer Spending, Trading

Please use the comments to demonstrate your own ignorance, unfamiliarity with empirical data and lack of respect for scientific knowledge. Be sure to create straw men and argue against things I have neither said nor implied. If you could repeat previously discredited memes or steer the conversation into irrelevant, off topic discussions, it would be appreciated. Lastly, kindly forgo all civility in your discourse . . . you are, after all, anonymous.

13 Responses to “Gift Giving Guide for the Traders in Your Life”

  1. streeteye says:

    I’ll take the quadcopter equipped with a submachine gun
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNPJMk2fgJU

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    BR: Awesome !

  2. Liquidity Trader says:

    I’ve had a Saddleback bag for 5 years, and its indestructible

  3. Petey Wheatstraw says:

    Olympus has many innovative products as a result of their Medical and Medical Imaging divisions.

    They also make a recorder that will record both sides of a cell phone conversation – and it doesn’t even connect to the cell phone.

    BTW: Check the laws on recording conversations in your state before you ever try this. If you are in a state that allows it, and so is the other party to the conversation, this can be of great value. it also comes in handy for recording conference calls (in situations where recording of the conversation is acknowledged by all parties, up front and/or as SOP), when you’re on the road or only have your cell available.

  4. theexpertisin says:

    BR. I am glad to discover you enjoy a quality cigar.

    So many fine cigars to savor — and only one lifetime to experience them. A shame, really.

  5. Ralph says:

    Nice list of movies — I would add Inside Job to it as well.

    And the Bond set you recommended was awesome — thanks for the heads up !

  6. dvdpenn says:

    I love these lists. This particular trader is especially fond of that beautiful leather satchel. But finding an amethyst purple Pax under the tree wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world …

  7. Richard W. Kline says:

    I’ll back Saddleback as well. Had one for two years and they’re the best of their kind. —And not mentioned, they convert into a surprisingly comfortable and effective backpack with no extra equipment, just re-attach the shoulder strap. Saddleback has, and sells, off it’s own website which has some of the most hilarious-garrulous descriptions I’ve yet found on the web: Buy from the producer, and cut the unnecessary monopolists at Amazon out of the transaction, sez I.

    I also love these product posts, Barry. I always learn something (that vaporizer looks like a sweetiepie).

  8. Jacko says:

    Second on the Padrons . . . Great stogies!

  9. Cato says:

    Check out Paul Smith ties also, some great designs, and Liberty are my personal favourite if you’re in London (no idea if they deliver to the US; might have airport stores…).

  10. 873450 says:

    Does Saddleback Leather provide an extended warranty? The briefcase looks like it will fall apart early in the 101st year.

  11. stonedwino says:

    Vaporizer?

    Damn BR, you are way cooler than even the Stonedwino thought…

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