Source: Abstruse Goose

Category: Science

Please use the comments to demonstrate your own ignorance, unfamiliarity with empirical data and lack of respect for scientific knowledge. Be sure to create straw men and argue against things I have neither said nor implied. If you could repeat previously discredited memes or steer the conversation into irrelevant, off topic discussions, it would be appreciated. Lastly, kindly forgo all civility in your discourse . . . you are, after all, anonymous.

13 Responses to “If extraterrestrials are monitoring us, this is what they’re seeing…”

  1. Petey Wheatstraw says:

    Certainly those watching would have either stopped watching or launched an attack on our planet after the first episode of Flash Gordon.

    • Clif Brown says:

      If they see Flash Gordon they will know, from the fact that the exhaust from his space-ship simply falls out the back, that he never escaped gravity.

  2. CD4P says:

    How do we know they don’t have us on mute already?

  3. kaleberg says:

    Back in 1978, Science had an article on the earth’s radio signature in the radio and television bands as seen from Barnard’s Star, Kruger 60 and a number of other stars. There was some speculation back then that pulsars might be dominated by television signals alternating quiet ordinary programming and extremely loud commercials. (OK, that was Russell Baker.) Apparently, the earth’s radio signature looked a fair bit different, so it is likely aliens might have been able to tell that these were intelligent transmissions, for certain value free definitions of intelligent.

  4. xatta says:

    Watch out, GI777! Life as you know it will never be the same once we humans infect you with Gilligan’s Island!

  5. 80HD says:

    Would they be impressed with our technology or appalled at what we do with it?

  6. constantnormal says:

    And won’t they be surprised, when our broadcast transmissions cease (because broadcast will have been replaced by fiber optic internet streamed content), and they figure that we have finally either devolved back into pond slime or blown ourselves up, so it’s safe to colonize this world … and come a-calling …

    Or perhaps they will have extrapolated our demise based on the rate of progress(?) displayed in our broadcast media, and have a fleet of robot terraformers en route right now, to patch up the old planet and slap a fresh coat of paint on it …

  7. constantnormal says:

    Where in this series of streamed content, are the regular splotches of political hate speech that occur quadrennially? Surely those would give any ET watchers a foreboding sense of who we are and what we are becoming …

    I wonder … has anyone checked the planning department archives on Alpha Centauri for a filing of construction of a hyperspace bypass through these parts? Surely no interstellar environmental impact assessment based on our noisy media signature could leave anyone with the impression that there was anything here worth preserving …

  8. willid3 says:

    probably listened once. determined there was no intelligent life here and moved on?

  9. 873450 says:

    Extraterrestrials were entertained watching humans imagine Flash Gordon, The Twilight Zone and Star Trek. They became intrigued when JFK made it real, charting an ambitious goal to land men on the moon in less than 10 years. They were impressed by our galvanizing “can-do” attitude, confidence, ingenuity and huge technological leaps enabling us to achieve that goal. They observed humanity engineered big government at its best and saw great potential.

    Unfortunately, shortly thereafter extraterrestrials grew disappointed watching us watch too much Gong Show for too many years. (Drugs?) Sadly, they came to realize the moon landings constitute a brief, shining, evolutionary peak moment for a human race that suddenly lost its spark and bearings before devolving into steep decline.

    Now just 3-4 decades later, except for a wannabe POTUS candidate promising to colonize the moon, extraterrestrials saw us pretty much abandon space exploration, deflecting Bradbury’s “final frontier,” mission “to boldly go where no man has gone before” back to the same old sci fi TV reruns that previously inspired us. And they see zombies everywhere. (Drugs? Again?) After 75 years monitoring American TV, extraterrestrials concluded the human race is mostly an existential threat to itself and all life stuck sharing the same planet. Like the NSA, they will continue recording everything we say and do on earth while actively searching for intelligence somewhere else.

  10. Biffah Bacon says:

    Nobody in our arm of the galaxy even watches RF broadcasts anymore since the eight eye pod came out.

  11. john lux says:

    after viewing all this, one extraterrestrial says to the other “so much for your intelligent life on earth theory” as gahan wilson wrote

  12. bluestatedon says:

    They’ve been here for thousands of years already, but they’re not here to enslave us, steal our water, impregnate our women, or roast us over a gigantic alien barbecue pit.

    Nope, they’re here simply to enforce the quarantine.