Posts filed under “Hedge Funds”

Holiday Gift Guide for Your Favorite Hedge Fund Managers

Thanksgiving is behind us, and we are in full Shopmas mode. By now, you should have already made up your list of who has been naughty — overcharging for subpar performance — and who has been nice (those rare alpha-generators). Reward them accordingly.

Let your favorite 2&20-er know exactly how much you appreciate their work with a thoughtful bauble or two. In our mad consumerist society you can remind these folks that their efforts are appreciated by choosing just the right gift from our hand-curated selection.

Disclosure: Just like last year, all of the items on this list are selected by your humble scribe, free from the interference of the PR flacks and other media manipulators who haunt my e-mail inbox. No compensation is accepted for these recommendations.

Here are my picks, gift-wrapped with a touch of snark, to help you play Santa to your favorite hedge-fund manager.

• “The Art of McCartney” ($23)

This is the easiest trade you will make all year: two CDs of 46 songs written or sung by Paul McCartney — as a Beatle, solo artist or with Wings — performed by a Who’s Who of musical talent. Part of the fun of this album is trying to guess which artist is covering which song. A DVD of how this project came together is also good fun. Spoiler alert: Some favorites include “Let It Beby Chrissie Hynde of the Pretenders; “Junior’s Farmby Steve Miller; an inspired choice of Kiss playing “Venus And Mars/ Rock Show; and the incredible vocals of Roger Daltrey on “Helter Skelter.” Senior fund managers of the baby-boom era and millennial traders alike will find something to love in this collection.

• “Breaking Bad: The Complete Series” ($255)

Give your favorite “bad” manager the complete series — 16 Blu-ray discs should help any manager lagging his benchmark to relax during off hours. They might even interpret some themes from the show as a warning of what happens to underperformers. The box set is loaded with lots of extra commentary, interviews with cast and crew, out takes and more. Sure, you can stream “Breaking Bad” at no extra charge on Netflix, but that’s for proles and office admins.

• “Triumph of the Optimists: 101 Years of Global Investment Returns”  ($123)

The first book to show comprehensive evidence of the long-term equity risk premium. Required reading for the fund manager on your gift list who hasn’t quite hit their benchmark, but is close.

• The Bay+ Oru Kayak for the (heh heh) active manager ($1,495)

A 12-foot, 28-pound kayak that folds into a 28” by 32” box for easy transport to anywhere you need to be in order to stay above that high-water mark. Never let your favorite leveraged-fund manager find themselves up a river without a kayak (paddles sold separately).

kayak photo


Clean shave: Moustache month is over, and unless you’re a 1970s porn star, it’s time for a smooth shave: Start with Billy Jealousy Hydroplane Super-Slick Shave Cream ($20) to lubricate your skin for less irritation and fewer nicks, or Musgo Real Shave Cream ($15). Use your favorite brush to lather this up straight out of the tube. After the shave, soothe the skin with Kiehl’s Calendula Herbal Extract Alcohol-Free Toner ($21). Finish it off with L’Occitane Cade Baume Apres Rasage ($34), with its light, non-greasy shea butter formula.

LifeSpan TR1200-DT5 Treadmill Desk ($1,350)

Keep the weight off your favorite fat-finger trader with this treadmill trading turret. If your manager is putting up great numbers, but putting on the pounds or has other health issues (high cholesterol, blood pressure), don’t let that alpha-generator slip away to the great beyond. Keep him here for a few more years with this top choice of PC Magazine. Perfect for the aspiring “active” fund manager. (Bloomberg terminal not included).

Music of the Season  Here is the soundtrack to this year’s holiday party: Start with A Charlie Brown Christmas,” by Vince Guaraldi ($7). The jazz soundtrack exudes the pure holiday magic of the original animated holiday special. It has become a quirky, humorous favorite that warms the soul. Then get the party moving with “Holiday For Swing” by “Family Guy” creator Seth MacFarlane ($10). A Christmas confection of McFarlane and a 52-piece orchestra, it brings to mind the best holiday cheer of Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and Bing Crosby. Finally, he may be serving 19 years to life for second-degree murder, but that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy “A Christmas Gift for You from Phil Spector.” (Thanks for the e-mails about last year’s “Ella Wishes You a Swinging Christmas“).


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Category: Consumer Spending, Hedge Funds, Humor

Why Are We So Focused on Everyone Else’s Wealth?

You all the know urban legend of the conversation between F. Scott Fitzgerald and Ernest Hemingway. Fitzgerald: “Let me tell you about the very rich. They are different from you and me.” Hemingway: “Yes, they have more money.” It never happened, but it points to an interesting question: Why are we in America so fascinated with…Read More

Category: Hedge Funds, Wages & Income

Best-performing Unconventional Alternative Investment Ranking

Source: Bloomberg

Category: Digital Media, Hedge Funds, Markets

Hedge Funds Take a Turn onto Madison Avenue

Source: Peppercomm h/t The Reformed Broker

Category: Digital Media, Hedge Funds

Analyzing Dips in the S&P’s Path

Bloomberg’s Michael Regan reports on stock market fluctuations and what they mean for investors.

Source: Bloomberg, Sept. 25 2014

Category: Federal Reserve, Hedge Funds, Technical Analysis, Video

Moral Hazard and the LTCM Bailout

Today is an auspicious anniversary, though it’s one I suspect many people may not recall. On Sept. 23, 1998, former Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan and William McDonough, then president of the Federal Reserve Bank of New York, managed to orchestrate the rescue of the hedge fund Long Term Capital Management. It was a strange…Read More

Category: Credit, Hedge Funds, Really, really bad calls

Why Hedge?

The news last Monday was a shock — the Calpers California earthquake. For a variety of reasons, the California Public Employee’s Retirement System, the nation’s largest public-pension fund, said it was dropping hedge funds from its roster of investment allocations. This tremor will be felt far and wide. We are unlikely to know the full…Read More

Category: Asset Allocation, Hedge Funds, Investing

CalPERS to Hedge Funds: Buh-Bye

This was the big news yesterday out of California: The California Public Employees’ Retirement System (Calpers) today announced that it will eliminate its hedge fund program, known internally as the Absolute Return Strategies (ARS) program, as part of an ongoing effort to reduce complexity and costs in its investment program. The staff recommendation, supported by…Read More

Category: Hedge Funds, Investing, Really, really bad calls

Quantifying the impact of chasing fund performance


Category: Hedge Funds, Investing, Think Tank

MiB: Jim Chanos, Kynikos Associates

This week’s Masters in Business Radio show is on at 10:00 am and 6:00 pm on Bloomberg Radio 1130AM and Siriux XM 119. Our guest is famed short seller and hedge fund manager Jim Chanos. You can listen to live here. All of the past Podcasts are here and at Soundcloud and coming soon to…Read More

Category: Hedge Funds, Media, Philosophy, Podcast, Short Selling